After fifteen years of waiting on God to reveal the details of the call He placed on my life when I was fifteen (yes, I’m 30 now), I find myself overwhelmed with gratitude as He finally begins to reveal the specifics of His plan after all this time. I’m also filled with a deep appreciation for the journey He has taken me on to arrive at this place, recognizing how each facet of my life has been a critical step in helping form the person I needed to become in order to begin fulfilling the ministry God called me to.
What a beautiful journey… every job I held, every person I met, every class I took… all working together (without me even realizing it) to get me where I needed to be. Even the challenging moments were critical factors in molding who I am; and still are. In fact, I think it’s better stated – ESPECIALLY the challenging moments because it’s the trials in life that have taught me the power of perseverance. As the scripture says:
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4 (NIV)
Though, perseverance at the time can seem utterly exhausting (and often painful!), it’s important to remember that it is a vital component to us becoming the person God wants us to become. What better test of our faith than having to endure some kind of hardship for an unknown period of time!
For me, one of the most difficult periods of perseverance was when I went back to work after having my first child. I was absolutely miserable! It just didn’t feel right, or natural, to leave my new baby girl for 9+ hours a day! I was torn! At the time we couldn’t afford for me to leave my job. I felt “stuck”. I remember crying out to God day and night for guidance… pleading with Him to provide some way for me to be able to stay home with my baby! But nothing… it wasn’t until my second child was born that I finally felt released to stay home with my children – this was after a year and a half of waiting.
It was through this period of, albeit agonizing perseverance that I learned to totally and utterly rely on God and rest in knowing that He truly wants what’s best for me, and my family. I learned to trust in Him on a deeper level than ever before.
Now, as God has begun to reveal the ministry He has called me to, I look back on this period, as well as the entire fifteen year span from when He initially called me to now, and I am starting to see just how each component has impacted my character, built up my “skill set” and helped to form me into the person He needed me to be in order to begin carrying out the mission and ministry He called me to all those years ago.
God has called each one of us to something special which requires some kind of journey to get to, but just remember – as you walk along the path – trust in Him with all your heart, don’t worry about tomorrow and continue to seek Him through prayer and through His word, knowing that God is preparing you for something wonderful, to “shine” in a way that only YOU can do!
“Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life.” Philippians 2:15b-16 (NIV)
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