When Aaron and I first got married I had an older woman in the church give me some advice that I wasn’t sure about at first, but tucked it away in my brain thinking that it might be necessary later in life. She told me that I needed to look nice for my husband, and look presentable when he got home from work. I laughed at this, hardly able to imagine a day that I wouldn’t look presentable to my new husband. We were newlyweds and I was still probably keeping lip gloss on the night stand so that as soon as I woke up I could get some on before Aaron saw me without any on. Heaven forbid he see me as I really look in the mornings! That doesn’t last long though, and sure enough throughout the years her advice kept ringing true in my ears.
As a working woman with no kids this was not an issue for me. I left for work each day just like Aaron did. I had to look presentable, because I had a principal and students that I was in front of each day. I couldn’t show up in pajama pants each day and expect to keep my job. Although I was also a coach, and so that helps out a lot in the wardrobe section on PE days!
A few years later we had our first child, and then 22 months later welcomed our second child home. Some of you are in this boat as I speak and you feel as though you are literally drowning in diapers, bottles, homemade baby food, and sound machine noise! This is when that sweet old ladies words began to ring in my ear louder than ever. There were a lot of days that I never left the house. I could wake up in the morning and go to bed that night in the exact same clothes and think nothing of it.
I began to think about her words more and they caused me to wonder if I really should be getting out of my pajamas for my husband. But then I thought, “Who care. He doesn’t stay home with these babies all day. Why should I care what I look like to him when he comes home.” Those words began to stiffen my heart towards him and I began to resent even being home with the kids all day. I wasn’t taking care of myself and surely Aaron didn’t even notice all the work that I did.
It was then that I realized what her words meant to me. I adore my husband and I want to be excited to see him when he walks in the door. I want him to be excited to see me. Remember those years when you were dating before all the kids invaded your lives, when you would get dressed up for each other just to go study at the library? Remember those butterflies you would get in your stomach as he would come to your door to pick you up?
As cheesy as this sounds, I still want that. I want to be excited for my man to come home, and honestly I don’t want to greet him at the door in the same clothes he saw me in the night before as he kissed me goodnight. I want to have fresh clothes on, my hair combed, and just maybe some lip gloss on if I’m feeling really good.
I want to do this, not because Aaron only loves me if I’m “put together”, but because I want to put forth the same effort I did when we were dating as I do now 12 years later. I want to view my body as the temple that it is, and therefore I want to take care of it, and nourish it correctly, and I want to be proud of the skin I’m in, no matter what size it is this year!
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you,
whom you have received from God?
You are not your own; you were bought at a price.
Therefore honor God with your bodies.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Jamie Ivey lives in Austin with her husband, Aaron, who is the worship pastor at The Austin Stone Community Church, and their four kids. She’s passionate about loving her husband, following Jesus, talking about adoption, and trying to be the best mom she can be to the four cutest kids in the world. She loves family nights, reading a good book, and could eat Mexican food three times a day. You can find her blogging at DreamingBigDreams.net, or on twitter @jamie_ivey.
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