I’ll be celebrating 10 years of married life in a few days. As I look back over the roller-coaster ride my husband and I have been through, I realize that my attitude has made a huge difference in our marriage. God has been working on me, molding me to be a better wife for my husband.
From my own experience, here are 5 important marriage decisions I made that improved the relationship between me and my husband.
1. Choose to not compare
I used to wish my husband would be like others, or do things that other husbands normally did. Even if I didn’t verbalize my thoughts, they did consume my mind and left me dissatisfied. When I realized the discontent this was breeding in my marriage, I trimmed down my tendency to compare and it did wonders for my marriage.
2. Choose to not complain
As women, we have the tendency to want things to be a particular way. And if they are not, we either complain or nag till it’s set right. The Bible warns us against being nagging wives. This instruction is obviously so important, that we find it written twice in the book of Proverbs!
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. (Proverbs 25:24, Proverbs 21:9)
When you make the decision not to nag your husband, or complain about him to others, you will find that there is less friction within your home. Your husband too, will start to notice the difference in your attitude and it will build up your relationship.
3. Choose to accept him
All husbands have their own set of positive and negative qualities. As wives, we should choose to accept our husbands just the way they are. They are a complete package and we need to accept them as a whole. It is better for your marriage if you don’t harp on all the things your husband lacks. God has chosen him to complement you and you need to accept him as he is.
4. Choose to appreciate him
After we’d been married a few years, I started to take for granted the things my husband did for me. I thought it was his duty to help me do the dishes and often demanded it from him! I never thought to appreciate his help, and it caused a bit of friction between us. But when I started appreciating him, the pressure wore off and he was more inclined to help me – not because he liked doing it, but because he loved me. Take note of the little things your husband does for you, your family or your home and thank him. Your appreciation means a lot to him.
5. Choose to submit to him
I have to admit, submitting to my husband is still a struggle for me at times. I am by nature headstrong, preferring to lead rather than follow. My husband, on the other hand, is more laid back. I used to be the one who led at the start of our married life, but I now choose to submit to my husband’s leadership. What has worked for me is, keeping my mouth shut when I really want to counter something he just said, and moving away from the situation. I hand over the reins to him and let him make the decision. I then stand by my husband’s decisions and emphasize it to my son as well. God gave me a command to submit to my husband and I’m willingly doing it.
It is our attitudes that often determine the depth of our relationships. Make just one decision today that will make a positive impact on your marriage.
What decisions have you made as a wife that have positively impacted your marriage?
© 2014, Sunu Philip. All rights reserved. Love it? Please share, pin, tweet or email but do not use my work without permission.