God’s been speaking to me lately.
I’m glad I’ve been able to recognize His voice admist the noise that is my life. Remember, I have 5 boys all under the age of 7. And a naturally loud husband. My life is noisy.
I’ll read something here. Hear something there. I wish I could recount to you all the places God has placed this message before me, but the truth is, I don’t remember them all. All I know is that the message seems to be in everything lately.
Live in the moment.
See, this isn’t easy for me. I’m a forward thinker. A planner. An organizer of people and events and things. I tend to facilitate this moment while thinking of the next moment while simultanesously laying out in my head the rest of the day, the rest of the week, what is coming up tomorrow, what I didn’t finish yesterday….
My to-do list is like a roladex in my head that is always spinning.
Top that with the distractions and demands of my young boys, and I might possibly be the worst person to hold a conversation with these days. Particularly because I have a 20-month old who likes to wander outside on his own and seems to find every possible ‘no-no’ this 6-years-in, child-proofed house still has to offer. And he’s stealth. Like a Navy seal or something. My years of bragging I can parent with my ears have failed me on this child. He gets out the back screen door without it making a sound.
Which leads me to have a panic attack, “Where is Gehrig?!!” every time I find myself engaged in any activity or conversation for longer than 4 minutes.
So, in every moment, there is about a hundred little things running through my head.
Okay, there is Gehrig. Five more minutes and I’ll get the boys in for lunch. I better pick up that project while I’m out here. What should I make for lunch? When I get them down for naps, I’ll make that phone call I should have yesterday and switch over the laundry and start on that blog post and grab something out of the freezer for dinner. Wait! Where is Gehrig? (Panic.) Oh, there he is sitting on the dog. That would be a cute picture. But where is my camera? In the house. Well, if I’m going in the house, I should carry in this box that I want to use to pack up those items to donate.
And on. And on. And on.
There is no “in the moment” in my life. I’m either reacting to the previous moment or getting ready for the next one.
But, this is God talking to me. He’s my parent. And as much as I want my boys to hear and obey my voice, He wants the same from me.
Live in the moment.
I want that. The Spirit within me jumps even as a write those words.
I want to be truly present for my son as he shows me his latest Lego creation. I want to truly listen to my friend as she shares her struggles with adjusting to her newborn. I want to infuse adventure into the life of my boys because boys need adventure like fish need water, and adventure can’t be planned. It happens in the moment.
Good thing this is God’s “to-do” for me, because I’m going to need His help.
Practice the discipline of the Present. (Ann Voskamp)
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