We all dream of becoming the woman that our man desires. But instead, we sometimes find closed doors! We get shut out from the very place we desire to be present – our husband’s heart!
We somehow aid our husbands in building up walls around their heart, giving us no access! And then we start lamenting…
“My husband is the most insensitive man on earth!”
“He just doesn’t care!”
“He is after his own pleasures and friendships!”
And so the list goes on and on… (I have personally said almost all of the above statements.)
It’s been almost 10 years now since we got married. In the first 7 years of our marriage, I did everything to build up the wall around my hubby’s heart. I didn’t realize then what harm I was bringing to my marriage. But God opened my eyes and helped me see where I went wrong. He slowly worked in me and I changed my ways. And just like magic… the door to my husband’s heart swung wide open for me!
I became the woman his heart desired. It was my dream come true!
Taking the key verse of this season’s theme as the basis, let’s try to open the doors to our husband’s heart wide open! And yes… these tips, I’m sure, will work wonders even for your already happy marriage!
“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” – Luke 11: 9
Ask ~ It will given to you!
Living with my husband for many years made me think I knew everything about him and his wants. Oh boy, was I wrong! God created man and woman differently, with different wants and needs. Unless we communicate, we won’t know what the other really wants.
I thought my man wanted a clean house when he came back from work. But what he really wanted was me sitting with him and talking (and if possible, rubbing his feet!!) What I perceived as his needs and wants were way different from what he wanted from me.
So take time today, to ask your husband:
- What he really likes?
- What is that one thing that he wants done before he comes from work?
- What are his dreams and aspirations?
- What can you do for him today?
- How can you pray for him?
Seek ~ You will find
I don’t know about you, but I used to seek my husband only when I needed some help… either to buy groceries, to help me with the dishes, to take care of this thing, to solve that problem… ahh! Ok, I did seek him, when I was newly married. But then as life happened, I stopped seeking him unless I needed some help. Instead of me becoming his helper, he became mine.
I now seek him… just to be with him – enjoying his chats or simply sitting with him as he watches TV. I plan dinner nights or lunch dates for just the two of us. I make it a point to set apart Sunday as family day. When I started seeking my husband with a passion, he opened up to me more and more!
Seek your husband with passion. After God, the most important relationship you have on earth is with your husband. Take time to be with him.
Knock ~ It will be opened
You won’t believe how much valuable time I wasted waiting for my husband to take the first step. I wasted 7 years of my marriage! Please my dear friends, don’t wait. Take the first step… and knock! You have absolutely nothing to lose. It’s just our puffed up egos!
If you’re not talking to each other, be the first to speak.
Be the first one to forgive after a conflict.
Instead of waiting for your husband to do something for you, you go ahead and do something for him.
The door to your husband’s heart may not open at your first knock. It sometimes takes a hundred more knocks to ease it open for you, but I promise you this, you will not regret it. Go ahead and knock!
These are lessons I learned through my life and my mistakes that I wanted to pass on to you. Friends, there is nothing on this earth as beautiful as a godly marriage. With God’s love and perseverance, you can do it.
© 2013 – 2014, Sunu Philip. All rights reserved. Love it? Please share, pin, tweet or email but do not use my work without permission.